... from the Resource Center ... a Book Review by Bill McLaughlin

 At the Will of the Body by Arthur W. Frank

Cancer is a Culture

Once encountered, cancer changes one’s life forever.  It may go into remission, but it can never be considered entirely cured.  The patient will twinge at every pain, confusion, or memory loss wondering if such ore a sign of its return.  Especially vulnerable are those who have undergone treatment by radiation or chemotherapy, either of which will include a long period of after effects.  No one, without having personally gone through the experience, will truly understand your condition.  And sometimes, they even trying to help, will upset you.  So it is wonderful to have help from a cancer survivor who not only understands you, but has written a book to help you.

At the Will of the Body is such a book.  And it starts with the title, for cancer causes exactly that to happen—your body takes over your mind.  You are no longer in control of (or accountable for) your many mood changes and unpredictable reactions.  Indeed, they will be as surprising to you as they are to those around you and “How can I help you?” is an impossible question to answer.  And there are no winners or losers determined by whether you live or die.  The very best the patient can do is to determine that he or she will try to outlast it.  Cancer will take its own time and move throughout your body at its own election.  Medicine does not control it.  It would be more proper to state that medicine learns how to appease it.  Unfortunately for us, each case is unique and there is no “cookie cutter” cure.  What works for one will not necessarily work for another.

The author first warns us that cancer is, in fact, a disease having two entirely separate parts; the medical part, and the patient part. Your doctor is experienced in the history and affects of the medical part.  Your doctor will advise you as to recommended treatment, but knows only the approved therapy.  You are but one of many patients and your association with him is limited to treatment time.  The 
patient must bear the patient’s responsibilities alone.  These include tolerating those around you, attempting to understand what is happening within you, and relating to a long and trying period (an 
“era” really) of new discovery about your own and very personal body.  You will be poked, prodded and openly discussed to the point that you will feel like a stranger to yourself.  This is the part that you must deal with, and it is the hardest part of all.  Some if it may seem familiar to the doctor, but considering yourself objectively rather than subjectively will be an entirely new experience for you—and scary.

Sadly, it gets worse.  The kindest advice I learned is that recuperation is harder than is the illness itself.  Friends may consider your homecoming as being “cured” but it starts a long, long period of rediscovery for you.  You must tolerate new limitations, the constant self-questioning of whether or not you can ever again be “the same” as before.  (You can-not so forget it)  And once a patient you will always be a patient.  Your future life will include repeated office visits, blood tests, and even scans of whatever sort.  Just realize that cancer is not a disease you can ever walk away from.  Reality is your best medicine; Tolerance (of caregivers) is your best compensation for them.  This all may sound harsh, but years of trying to help a wife did not prepare me for my own cancer.  What did help is At the Will of the Body and the warnings from a cancer survivor about the recuperation phase.

So what is there “good” about cancer?  Absolutely, it will bring you closer to God.  I cannot imagine the experience not imprinting both patient and caregiver with the understanding that God is the source 
of all wisdom and that every life has a purpose.  “Attitude” will mean so much.  Cancer is neither a punishment nor a personal failure.  If anything, perhaps it should be viewed as a test—though I am 
not sure of what.  But personal acceptance of the fact of cancer is an essential part of the whole experience.  “Ours not to reason why” any more than could the brave charge of British cavalry during the Crimean War.  Had they questioned their orders they would never have charged into canon fire.  Should the patient question the “Why Me”, that patient surrenders faith?  Fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom.  For me, it was a great relief to realize that God was in charge of my cancer and that the doctor and I had only to perform our respective roles.  I was in charge of the role I had to 
play and so, did not waste my effort trying to affect the outcome.  There are, in fact, three parts to cancer: the doctor, the patient, and God.  Of the three, God certainly triumphs over the other two.  
This is NOT to say that those who succumb to the disease are, in any way unfaithful in their belief; rather, it is to confirm God’s purpose.  We are all God’s children, irrespective of the roles for 
which He prepares us.  It has been said of war that there are no Atheists in fox holes.  If the same cannot be said for cancer patients in their illness, at least I, for one, can attest from personal experience, that my belief in God was better than any medicine, and that I have no hesitation in attesting to the power of
His Grace.

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